How I Beat Count Dracula
The touch of her hand gives me goosebumps. I would take a picture; but that would be cheating. I am an old school around the way type of guy. As much as I am a gentleman I am a gangster. I am not a killer, nor thug-but back in the day; I put skin under the rug. To hide the memories of the past; after killing immortality; I find myself wanting. Millenia of death and destruction; I divided the heavens and created hell with a spell. They used to call me the Count. They called me that because I am so striped; you could peer into the heavens and see the casualties I am responsible. I was the first of my kind. They called us humans. I was a servant. I was a peasant. In my meager abode they gave me the weakest of all creatures; they called her woman.
I was so poor, and destitute they came unto my family and asked me to pay tribute.
I said unto SaTan of all the fruits of the garden you may freely eat; but of the Tree of Life; even after The Lineage of My Family Tree you may not eat.
They consumed all of my people but 7.
Again they came unto me and said: We are hungry, we are thirsty, we are in need of Thee.
Thus I saith unto them: Yea, ye have drunken and thirst upon the fatlings of my flock-are Thou Not The Supreme Beings of The Earth?
Yea, ye know not that ye have bitten the hand that feedeth thee. For unto poison I.V. have I defeated thee and ye have been made subject to the taste of the nectar of my vine. O Ye so mighty in the Heavens; I beseech thee-and now thou doest as I biddest-for Of The Covenant you did agree:
Ye are bound, O ye are consumed by your own appetite of destruction. Ye cannot eat of us-For we are the last of the mohicans. I will create images; they are not as good-but if you eat us; to what good are the images without The Originals.